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Some days, The Bearded Man doesn’t want to be discovered for the maniac he truly is. When he’s in these moods, he goes deep into the Alaskan wilderness and saws down trees methodically — coldly, like some sort of heartless beast or machine. One smooth saw stroke at a time… Forward… Backward… Forward… Backward… He brings down some of the largest trees, but he’s never in a rush. He’s a burly fellow, with a hearty beard that like a chameleon changes depending on his surroundings. Some times you’d swear he was a red-headed Scotsman, other times his lustrous beard would be jet black set against olive skin. Nevertheless, this relentless lumber-jacking quieted the deranged ramblings of his spirit — if only for a little while. You see, it’s not that he WANTED to be a maniac, mind you. It’s just that he was always listening to Shelter Point’s brooding tunes on his iPod. The second he stopped listening, his desire to be a lumberjack stopped. Still, before he made that realization, he damn near cleared half the forest!

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